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Jan 14, 2025
Marriage is considered a sacred institution in India, often influenced by cultural, familial, and societal expectations. The debate between arranged marriages and love marriages has been ongoing for decades. In Indian society, arranged marriages are seen to have a higher success rate than love marriages, but why is that the case? Let’s explore the reasons behind the long-lasting nature of arranged marriages and how they continue to thrive in contemporary India.
1. Family and Cultural Support
In arranged marriages, the involvement of family members plays a pivotal role in the relationship’s success. Indian culture places a high value on family bonds and responsibilities, and when two families come together to arrange a marriage, it strengthens the support system. Both partners are not just entering a relationship with one individual but with an entire family. This extended support system helps resolve conflicts and navigate difficult situations with a sense of community and shared responsibility.
In contrast, love marriages typically begin with the emotional connection between two individuals, and though families are often involved later, the absence of pre-established familial ties may lead to challenges. The lack of involvement from both families can result in misunderstandings and lack of support, which can create strain on the marriage over time.
2. Compatibility and Shared Values
In an arranged marriage, families generally take the time to assess compatibility beyond physical attraction. They consider factors like education, financial stability, cultural values, social background, and family traditions. This holistic approach ensures that both individuals are likely to have similar life goals and outlooks. Shared values are a cornerstone of any strong marriage, and in arranged marriages, these values are often aligned from the very start.
Love marriages, on the other hand, often begin with intense emotions that may cloud rational judgment. While love and attraction are vital in any marriage, compatibility in terms of lifestyle, values, and future goals is equally important. In some cases, partners in love marriages may not realize differences in values until later, leading to issues down the line.
3. Lower Expectations and Practical Approach
One reason arranged marriages tend to be more successful is that the individuals involved have more realistic expectations. Since arranged marriages are typically based on practical considerations, they don’t rely solely on emotional highs or romantic fantasies. Both partners enter the marriage with an understanding that it requires work, patience, and adjustments. This realistic mindset can help them handle challenges more effectively.
In contrast, individuals in love marriages might start with very high expectations, often influenced by romanticized ideas about relationships. When the realities of married life set in, the pressure to meet those expectations can cause frustration, leading to potential conflict and dissatisfaction.
4. Parental and Societal Influence
In India, the approval and blessings of one’s parents are seen as essential for a successful marriage. Parents, who often have decades of experience in relationships, provide invaluable advice and guidance. Their emotional investment in the marriage motivates both partners to make it work, leading to long-term commitment. Furthermore, societal expectations emphasize the sanctity of marriage, often creating a supportive environment for married couples.
While love marriages can also have family and societal support, this is not always the case. In some situations, families might oppose the marriage, especially when the relationship is seen as unconventional. Without the support of both families, couples may face challenges in navigating societal pressures.
5. Emotional Maturity and Gradual Love
In arranged marriages, partners typically take time to understand one another before developing deep emotional connections. This slower, more deliberate process of building affection often results in stronger, more sustainable love. Emotional maturity develops over time, as couples learn about each other’s strengths, weaknesses, and coping mechanisms.
On the other hand, love marriages often begin with intense infatuation that may not always translate into lasting affection. The emotional rollercoaster that comes with passionate love can be difficult to sustain, and when the initial excitement fades, couples may face difficulties in maintaining the relationship.
6. Focus on Commitment Over Romance
Arranged marriages emphasize long-term commitment over the pursuit of constant romance. In Indian culture, marriage is seen as a lifelong commitment to one’s partner and their family. The couple's sense of responsibility and duty towards one another fosters emotional connection, respect, and understanding. Over time, these feelings solidify into a bond that can withstand the tests of time.
In contrast, love marriages may sometimes struggle to maintain that level of commitment, especially when the initial romantic feelings wane. The challenges that come with building a life together, including financial pressures, parenting, and work-life balance, can put a strain on the relationship, especially if the commitment to each other isn’t as firmly established from the start.
Conclusion
Arranged marriages in India are successful for several reasons, including the strong support system, compatibility, realistic expectations, and family involvement. The emphasis on long-term commitment over fleeting emotions ensures that partners approach the marriage with a mindset focused on stability and mutual respect. While love marriages can also succeed, arranged marriages often provide a better foundation for enduring relationships in Indian culture.
For those looking to take the first step toward a successful and well-matched marriage, seeking professional guidance can be a valuable option. Wedding Alliances, a trusted partner in matrimonial services in Delhi, provides a reliable platform for finding partners who share similar values, interests, and life goals, paving the way for a strong and lasting marriage.